Cynthia and Sarah

It has been awhile since I posted but little has changed. The same mouth sores, the same radiation sores that need attention, the same hunger for food that I can no longer eat.  Trying to feel ones fingers is a lost cause but having them is so much better than not having them. I have now went through over fifteen different drugs trying to find a solution. I am wearing a fentanyl patch. Highly addictive but necessary.

The final day of chemo/radiation is usually a significant day, you have went through hell now you wait. I was enthused, I was ready to fight. Within four hours the side effects started showing up. My radiation markers were moved on my rump and I was burned raw within my crotch area. Why did these move, was it an accident, talk to me doctor that's all I ask.  My hands have now completely peeled and look like lobsters claws.  I have lost thirty two pounds although a few have been added back in the last few days.  I ended up back in the hospital. Four nights now and who knows. I miss my wife, I miss my TV, I miss my bed, I miss my friends.  I missed the big game in Florida between Bethel College and Ave Maria University coached by two of our former Bethel players.

Today was a great day however. Two young nursing students from Saint Mary's college were brought to the hospital by their professor.  As part of their nursing training they had to care for me.  They were so special, so alive, and they both had such beautiful smiles. We talked about life, aging, influential people, attitudes, confidence, and just being thankful for what we had. Mother Maureen also stopped by and we all talked. We each took something away from our meeting, I know I did.  She thanked me afterwards for the life lessons and she added me to the prayer list at the church.

When in a short period of six hours you instantly bond with someone, you have met truly remarkable people, and it is something you can't explain but you know that God wanted all of us together today. Thank you Cynthia and Sarah, You made me feel special. I hope somewhere in today's talks you took something away to use in life.

I did and will never forget you!  Now about those cold hands.....................