The final days of Chemo and Radiation

Tomorrow is my final day of chemo and radiation. I am sore everywhere it is possible to be sore. Everyday I see the same faces, the same nurses and practitioners, the same sad faces on so many many people. The dietitian is pregnant as well as the radiation specialist. I think about the irony of the beginning of life cycles and the smiles on their faces when they talk about their future families. I only hope that when they get to our ages there is a cure but somehow I doubt there will be. I always get a kick out of driving through the parking garages at the hospitals and look at the cars of the doctors and admins. I see Porsches, Bentleys, a Rolls Royce, a red Ferrari 458 Italia, Mercedes up the wazoo, you name it and all expensive. All parked next to the doors and a short walk from the entrance while the many patients and visitors drive around in circles looking for a place to park. My radiation doctor told me today that they push you to the max and then back off just enough to see what you can handle. He said yeah, it might hurt a little but better than not doing it. I looked at him for a few minutes and he could tell I was constructing a well thought response but what I had in mind would have been inappropriate in that I am not licensed to carry. I wonder if he had to make that call on a loved one if he would have been so callous in his remark. So my next step is somewhere between four weeks and eight weeks I will have the surgery. No one has appraised me as to what to expect and I imagine it will be a surprise as things seem to be lately. In my recovery plan I am to follow with 24-30 weeks of follow up chemo. I just came off one of the most potent chemos there is 5-FU. So far my hair is still here, softer and thinner, but still here. I would gladly give my hair to a young lady from our Mishawaka Northside Little League days by the name of Kristi. She shows how to fight this way more than I can and I admire her so much. The next step, the next challenge, and on top of it the next ACA challenge upcoming. God, my wife, and my friends are holding me up right now. I am going to take a week away in early March to just visit a new friend I have made on Facebook, see some relatives in Ohio, and find a place I can relax and just read. Perspective I guess and finding a room with a fireplace and an Irish setter laying next to it might be a little hard to find in Northeast Ohio.